19 July 2008

Married couple caught: husband with mustache kissing wife in high heels

When Indianapolis was first transformed from small farming communities into the bustling city it is today, the women ran into some trouble.

Those urban-chic ladies were struggling because they were not used to the cracks and holes in the grates of the new streets. Their city-styling high heels were getting stuck in the gaps and they were breaking their ankles.

Out of anger (I'd be mad if my high-heeled Oxfords broke too) they decided they'd sue the city of Indianapolis for damage.

In an act of self-defense, Indianapolis decided to outlaw high heels. Therefore, it is technically illegal to wear high heels in the street in Indianapolis.

Thank goodness New York City does not have the same law, or Kelly Ripa might have thrown a fit. The recent Regis and Kelly High Heel-A-Thon would have been far less successful had police officers been trying to cuff the stilettoed athletes.

High heels are not the only offensive fashion piece in Indy. Men face a restrictive law as well: mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.

You might think these laws seem a little ridiculous, but, I certainly wouldn't say that. Not because I hate 'staches and shoes, but because it goes against my principles. One of my strictest rules is that I never speak poorly of where I'm from.

I just always feel so sad for those people that hate their hometowns or states. It makes me wonder what kind of horrible upbringing they had.

Being from Indiana, it's especially important to hold steadfast to my rule. People are always eager to call it a fly-by state or make a joke about cornfields. (How quickly they forget the Colts...!) But, I know there really is more than corn in Indiana and I'm proud to be a Hoosier.

After the most recent issue of Indianapolis Monthly hit the stands, I was proud not only to be from Indiana, but from Zionsville as well. Some may call it a sleepy and sheltered bubble, but it's part of who I am, and I'm happy to call it my home. Besides, we may have an early town curfew, but we're allowed to wear high heels all we want.

3 comments:

  1. your indiana pride is beautiful!

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  2. I just can't help myself...I'm addicted to your blog!

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  3. see, in my mind, it's the Colts that are the blemish on the face of Indiana. the corn is alright with me!

    but I know exactly where you're coming from, being a New Hampshirite myself...

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