07 May 2014

why i haven't been blogging

I know I haven't been much of a blogger lately  and I'd like to tell you it's because I started a new role at work, had friends in town, went out of town and finally got new a car. 

And all of those things would be true. 

But the real truth is that lately I just haven't wanted to blog. I've been too weighed down by the keeping up. 

I've blogged for years because I love to write, but this winter something shifted for me. 
I became worried about my analytics. 
I felt like I should have clothes cute enough for people to want.  
And exciting events to constantly tell you about. 
And a cute baby or puppy to show you. 
Or, at the very least, a recipe to share.

I started to feel like my real life wasn't as worthy of living as the lives of other bloggers. I started to feel jealous of other bloggers who are friends - wondering if I wasn't cool enough to be invited into the blogger-friend-club. 


And because half of my brain knows this is not true, but half of my brain craves being accepted - more views, more likes, more RTs - I shut down. I knew that posting any of the above things for the wrong reason (which is what mine would have been) would not have been true to myself. 

Is it wrong to share a recipe I love? Of course not! 
Is it wrong to post it because I want 1,500 people to pin it and Buzzfeed to pick it up and everyone to think I'm so creative? Uh huh. Oh yeah. My worth isn't defined by how many recipe pins I get. 

Also, I've long struggled with the writer vs. blogger dichotomy. I never set out to be a blogger - I set out to write, to share my thoughts and to make a positive, real impact on the world. But, one thing led to another and before I knew it I was guest posting, weekend recapping and recipe creating. Before I knew it I was more concerned with the photos for each post than I was with the content itself. 

And to be a blogger is not wrong. I love reading so many blogs. I find recipes and workouts almost primarily through blogs I love. I find outfit ideas and home decor and a million amazing things. There are girls out there who are truly meant to blog right now - they are saying beautiful, wonderful things full of conviction and passion.

But, I want to participate in the blogosphere not because I want to keep up with it, but because it excites me. I want to write and to share the things about which I feel convicted. Sometimes it may be through a recipe and sometimes it may be through my photos. 

What this has taught me is that I don't want to do anything - whether it be blogging, writing, photographing or anything in between - with the hope of keeping up and being accepted. I want to do these things because they excite me. They give me energy. They are my passions. 


So now what? I don't know. I don't know if this confession will reinvigorate me and suddenly tomorrow I'll be giving you a weekend recap and a bucket list update. It could happen. Or maybe I'll wake up in the middle of the night tonight, struck by some post that I just have to get down on paper. 

We will see. 

But today, I'm taking back my blog. I'm running toward it, not away from it. I'm believing that the blog - and life - I have created are enough. Whether I have 5 or 5,000 views tomorrow need not matter. Because this life is worth living no matter what. 

15 comments:

  1. I have always said that blogging should be fun and should never feel like a chore. When it feels like a chore that means a break is warranted - which it wounds like you've done and that you've rediscovered the fun of it :)

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  2. as a new reader, i've loved going into your archives and reading anything fresh you have to offer. i selfishly hope you will continue blogging, but as a former blogger, i understand what a crazy commitment it is! so instead, i hope you find lots of peace and well-being. xx

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  3. I really love this. I fell into that same trap last spring and it wasn't until I took a step back over the summer that i was really able to understand why I was blogging and let go of all of the rules i set for myself in my head. Thanks for your honesty, you absolutely should be able to write what you want, when you want, regardless of what the numbers say or how many followers you have :)

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  4. Hi Whitney--I just wanted to say that I've always loved your blog because you aren't like everyone else; posting recipes, workouts, and always having something super exciting going on in your life. It's just you, and that is what's so great :) I hope you continue to blog as well because I've always felt the most connection with your posts. Have a great day!

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  5. Hi Whitney! Just letting you know that I absolutely love reading your blog! I start my day by reading it on my way to work and it always brightens my day. You are an amazing writer and I love reading your thoughts. No matter what you decide to do your blog is amazing and I find it truly inspiring. Hope you have a great week!

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  6. You go Whitney!! Regardless of how often you blog, or what you blog about, you KNOW I will always be your #1 fan!!! :) Alongside Goldy. We have been hooked since that first summer.

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  7. Hi Whitney - I just wanted to let you know that I absolutely love reading your blog. I am 22 and moved to Atlanta last August. My best friend from college sent me your blog last summer right before I moved here because of the bucket list and I have read your blog every day since. Your blog has been so inspiring for me, not only in terms of exploring Atlanta but also in terms of all your advice for 20-something girls. I cannot tell you how many times I have read that section. It's almost embarrassing. You are one of the most honest bloggers I have come across so I too selfishly hope you keep blogging, but I wish you well in life no matter what you decide! Have a great day!

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  8. I adore your blog. But, I adore YOU even more. You're the best. 1 page view or a million. :)

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  9. I LOVE your blog (and I am a total stranger...sorry if that's creepy, but just wanted to let you know I'm objective here). You know why? Because I can relate to you as a twenty-something girl -- I feel like I could be your friend in real life -- but you also offer insights that I can't always reach myself (advice for 20somethings, about relationships, etc). A lot of other blogs I read are like novels...I really enjoy them, but they're so far from my life that they are not relatable. You, on the other hand, are clearly brimming with interests and passion, but your life is relatable, and that's why I love reading your blog. You be you, that's why your blog is great to start with!

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  10. I've been feeling like this a lot in regards to my own blog...it started out as something I was so excited to do and has slowly evolved into something that I feel obligated to do. I've definitely scaled wayyyy back.

    Anyway. I LOVE your blog, but you do what you think is best--keep blogging, scale back, or stop for the moment.

    xo

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  11. Yours is one of the few blogs that I read, so please keep posting! I love how honest you are, and how you are committed to being a woman of faith in this crazy world. Your writing is appreciated!

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  12. I am also a silent blog reader! I enjoy your posts so much and they always start my day off on the right foot :)

    In addition, it is so interesting how all of us fall into the comparison trap, because just as you say you compare yourself to those "big-time" bloggers, I sometimes find myself comparing my life to those of blog writers' (like yours), and see mine as much less glamorous than others. It's important to keep it in perspective that we're all driving our own road, and life looks much brighter when filtered! xo

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  13. Oh, girl. I'm sure every blogger out there can relate to this on some level. There's plenty of benefit to considering what is catchy and most marketable, but we must first write for the love of it. I remind myself every time I sit down to write: great content always comes first. And if your writing inspires and challenges even one person, you have made a difference! I am grateful for you and your words, my fellow blogging friend.

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i'd loooove to hear from you! you make my day! <3